Greetings, vigilant readers! 

Care to know some quirky facts about me? Read on if you do!

1. I am 20-years old and am currently pursuing a Bachelor of Science in Human Biology and a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology.

2. I’m a self-professed grammar, punctuation, and (occasionally) spelling tyrant, mainly borne of the fact that I used to write like the left hemisphere of my brain was short-circuited. I, however, do concede that I make many grammatical mistakes; although, I usually discover them before anyone has a chance to debase me from my pedestal.

3. I once had a friend tell me that I look like an Eskimo. I laughed and informed her my people are called Inuits now.

4. My physique has taken a dramatic change in the last 8 years. While my legs once resembled angel-hair pasta, now, they’re big and muscular. Unlike typical women whose legs imply — “I’m a damsel in distress, please carry my heavy bags for me!” — mine convey the message — “Lay a single finger on me and I’ll kick your ass.” You see, a select few females can gloat and say they have an hour-glass-shaped body. I can say I have 3 hour-glasses: My body and my 2 legs.

5. I prefer the Benz S-Class over the BMW 7-Series. My hour-glass legs need the extra room.

6. I have an unspoken rule whereby I won’t sit down on a public bus unless there are at least 5-6 seats unoccupied. I’m always paranoid that a myriad of elderlies will board the bus suddenly and no one will be willing to bequeath their seat. If, however, the formerly crowded bus then becomes empty, I still won’t sit down because it’s too much of a hassle — unless, of course, I am in the way.

7. I have a soft spot for men with green or hazel eyes and dark brown hair… coupled with a black cashmere or wool overcoat and a black fedora, porkpie, or Trilby. A dark brown or black leather jacket with a cream-colored scarf around the neck would suffice, too. Oh! And men in suits! Pin-striped are the best, or a solid black suit with a firebrick red dress shirt underneath.

8. I wish I had a friend like Tommy Corn from I Heart Huckabees. We would have so many hours of endless fun together!

9. I’ve always wanted to meet a person who resembles me exactly in character just to see what type of aura my personality exudes off to other people.

10. My friend Wendy once said to me, “People don’t like Mimi because they’re just jealous of her. People don’t like me because I have a conceited face. People who don’t like you are just plain stupid.” This is also the same friend who once told me I needed to grow a backbone.

11. When I was in elementary, I wanted to be a teacher — though not for the desire to enlighten little kids; rather, I loved drawing and writing on the school transparencies. My heart would skip a beat every time the teacher let me write the answers to a set of homework questions on the overhead.

12. I stole a Barbie shoe from a friend’s house when I was seven. As you can tell, I still haven’t managed to forgive myself for the incident. Rest assured, though, I haven’t stolen anything since that day. Oh yeah, I was such a rebel back then.

13. I’m rather obsessive-compulsive when it comes to chewing my food on the left or the right buccal cavity of my mouth. When I was younger, my mom scarred me forever by telling me that if I chew my food too much on one side, then my face would grow crooked towards that side. Henceforth, I always alternate mastication between the left and the right with each bite. What can I say? I’m superficial, and I’m not afraid to admit to it.

14. I like the name Celeste.

15. One of my endeavors is to learn all the major languages in the world — except German, it sounds too angry for me. So far, I have Chinese (Mandarin; I can’t understand Cantonese to save my life), English (obviously), and Spanish (though, it needs to be a smidgeon repolished) down.

16. My mom’s ambidextrous. I’m currently trying to master using my left hand as well as my right. It’s not going too well because it still looks worse than chicken-scratch. Goodness gracious — I can’t even began to imagine how much time cursive is going to require till proficiency.

ambid.png

17. I bought my first bra after my elementary library teacher pulled me to the side of the room to tell me it was time I invested in one. Yes, it was quite embarrassing.

18. Supposedly, my real first name sounds Hawaiian, so much so that my P.E. teacher in 6th grade decided to say my name whilst doing the hula dance in front of the entire class.

19. I may just be the most indecisive person you will ever meet — mostly borne of my complete indifference — when deciding at which restaurant to dine, or (in general) where to go. I usually have to repeat, ‘I really don’t care,’ at least five times before the counterparty realizes that I really don’t care. If indecisiveness isn’t an option, then take me to all the suggested locales. You’re happy; I’m happy; mission accomplished.

20. I’m apathetic towards most things; ergo, I’m usually the ventee rather than the venter. However, there are issues that I feel strongly towards, but I only divulge my perspectives on such matters to the select few people who are genuinely willing to listen.

21. I tend to hold a double standard when it comes to gauging whether a certain action is morally justified based on the individual in question. A deed that I may consider unethical if I were the perpetrator may not necessarily be regarded as unethical if it were undertaken by someone else, granted that there is a legitimate reason behind it. Thus, I’m either a hypocrite or an open-minded individual… or both?

22. The phrase, “I had a bad day,” is not a part of my vocabulary. Rather, I use phrases such as, “I had a rough hour” or “It was an unpleasant few minutes.”

23. I like all colors (or hues, if you must) except for grey simply because it is too drab. Imagine a solid grey dress — no other colors are present — isn’t it dull? You’re like a walking block of concrete with a bopping head attached. However, if, conceptually speaking, you are referring to the “grey area” of a scenario or perspective, then I’m already on the bandwagon.

24. I prefer even numbers over odd numbers.

25. Unless the number is a factor of 5.

26. If I had to name 2 fictional female characters that I absolutely cannot tolerate, I would answer with Miss Piggy and Olive Oyl without hesitation. One is narcissistic beyond any normal level of acceptance and exceedingly loud to boot whilst the other is more shallow and dry than Harper Lake, coupled with her unbearably whiney personality.

27. I have a high tolerance for pain, and crying in front of others (aside from my parents) only occurs once in a blue moon for me.

28. One of my major flaws is my tendency to dispense advice even when it may be unwarranted.

29. I’m a very passive person. Screaming, fighting, and/or arguing are very rare occurrences in my life. If you’ve managed to inflame my temperament, you must have done something severely iniquitous. However, I usually don’t hold grudges, so you’d most likely be shortly forgiven.

30. I have a mild, hereditary skin condition called keratosis pilaris that I have been extremely self-conscious about for the majority of my life. I’ve only recently begun to accept the condition as it is and feel comfortable in my own skin.

31. I tend to overanalyze things to the Nth degree, albeit I’m fully aware of the fact that sometimes a cigar is simply… just a cigar.

32. I have selective hearing against human speech, so don’t take it personally when I keep repeating — Excuse me?

33. I adore hats, scarves, shoes, and coats. Unfortunately, (1) Hats don’t look wonderful on me (2) I only have 3 scarves (3) Occasions for wearing my beautiful shoes are rare (4) Coats are usually unnecessary in the scorching Texas weather.

34. Whole Foods Market is my definition of heaven on earth.

35. I am “Jack of all trades, master of none, though ofttimes better than master of one.”

36. Good food is the way to my heart.

Advertisements

4 Responses to “Révélé”

  1. natalierose Says:

    oh my goodness…i CRACKED UP reading this!!!

  2. Chérie Says:

    Whoo — yay for endorphins!

  3. the ello person Says:

    =) Hermes Cabin… murder is red rum backwards… overanalyse you say?lol

  4. Chérie Says:

    And what, pray tell, warrants the “Hermes Cabin” comment, my dear sister?

    Goodness gracious! You spell overanalyse with an “s”! An “s”! What say you we ship you to Great Britain, aye?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s